Apologies Needed

For those who say, “The problem with the church is that we have become too tolerant, allowing the ‘world’ (or culture) to dictate what we believe.” What a load of candy-coated, hedge protecting crap! I can’t speak on behalf of Jesus; (though I often try) I’ll stick with the image of Jesus healing the lepers, redeeming the tormented souls, embracing the women and children. These are all people who were marginalized by their society. I am ashamed at myself! I claim to be Christ-like but how often do I sit with the poor, or learn their names? I plead for the case of the battered woman who keeps going back but I don’t take the time to understand why she returns. I want to embrace my homosexual friends but the little voice rings inside my ears “it’s a sin”! What a load of crap! I’m labeling people, marginalizing people, anointing people with the “sin” sticker. To you, who may have had a brush with my kind, I apologize!

For those who say, “If you don’t think ‘America’ is the greatest place, just leave”. Don’t mind if I do. I’m not bashing the freedom I experience as an American citizen. There are people who have fought long and hard, just for me to have the freedom to make a claim like this. To those, I am grateful. To those who have used our bountiful resources to obtain more than our share—I am ashamed. And we do this so unabashedly. I often catch myself saying, “I need… I deserve more… I’ve earned.” I’m pathetic! I wallow in my prosperity, enjoying my $12 shirt made in a sweatshop in Haiti; all the while I claim to live a Christ-like existence. America may provide many freedoms but at what cost to the world around us? To those who work, for my gain, I apologize!

For all of us who drink a bottle of water and toss it in the garbage, for all of us who watch a plastic bag fly in the wind or get mad when it gets twisted around our fence or the bottom of our cars, we suck! This place, the bobbling green and blue thing we call Earth, this is all we get! We have grown accustomed to the principle: If we run out we’ll just scurry to the store and buy some more. That may work with beer but when it comes to clean drinking water, crop production, climate control—this is all we’ve got! Those who say, “Global warming is a myth, scientists are still out on the verdict.” I say, wake up! Regardless of the facts the reality remains—THIS IS ALL WE’VE GOT! How can we selfishly say, “drill baby, drill” just because it’s within our borders when we all know that it’ll just delay the inevitable—it’ll one day be gone, all used up. We are too many, too demanding, too resource hungry. To those who have pled for my attention, for years, I apologize that it has taken this long!

And I say all of this claiming to be a Christ-follower. He’s the redeemer, right? The one that God sent because humanity was crappin’ all over this good thing God had going, right? It seems to me that we’re still crappin’. I’m ashamed of us! And we call ourselves the church? We call ourselves the “people of God”? If this is what it means to be a Christian, I want O-U-T! I’m tired or going to my stained glass place of worship and hearing people talk about the pastor not wearing a suit, or that women are somehow lesser, or the fact that the poor, the broken, the hurt, the sick, gays, Democrats, the ethnically diverse, and religiously diverse are all going to hell and we’re not afraid to send them.
Look at me! I’d love to say, “Jesus loves you, we are all God’s children, etc.” But I still bought that shirt from Haiti, I still want a gas-guzzling SUV, I still don’t exactly know how to embrace my gay friends while ensuring that my husband (who is amazing) will stay employed, or buy the bottle of water and toss out the trash. I still see American Christians acting the way that we do and I am ashamed. So much so that I’d rather remove my little “Christian” badge. I hate that in one breath I say, “God loves world” but there’s something “missing” among those Muslims, those gays, those women. There is lack of drive among the poor, that impoverished nation, the workers who bleed for pennies in pay. And we do it all in the name of Jesus, our Christian (and some say national) heritage. No wonder all my friends who have had a brush with our kind call us hypocrites—maybe they’re right! “Jesus loves the little children ALL the children of the world” and if we are Christ’s representation in this world, we seriously have to stop loving conditionally!